Wednesday, March 30, 2011

alone on ebay is never good

i should really learn my lesson about "watching" auction items...cuz i get that crazy alert from my droid app that it's ending soon, and i feel compelled to see what it's selling for.

and then i pull the bidding trigger with 44 seconds left, figuring i'll get outbid like always.
and i end up getting this dress for $52.

at least it's priced online at $168.

ready for summer...with sub-70's temps

mother nature has dealt us a little taste of fall/winter the last day or so...i wore a light sweater and jacket yesterday on a target run.

BUT my closet? my closet is ready and raring for warmer temperatures.
oh hello new wedges. aren't you 2 (or 4) ready for your date with the outside world?? it's coming soon my pretties.
love these brown ones, and the way they zip up the front...i think they look more expensive than the $20 i paid for them.
and my beloved black dolce way of target of course.
yes, i'm 5'10". and yes...i routinely wear 3 1/2 to 4 inch heels. clearly...when i'm not, i'm wearing those ratty grey sneakers. at least when i'm mowing the grass.
and my mostest favoritest thing of all?!?

MY NEW SUNHAT. yes, i have dreams of lounging in my friend's pool, sipping redneck sangria (aka wine and cran-pomegranate juice) out of a tervis tumbler, and feeling MUCH more fabulous than a jobless girl should.

cuz sunhat means trophy wife right?

even though this trophy wife only shelled out $2.50 for this hat...and another $2.50 for its lighter cousin. if i could find a black one...i'd be happy for life.

or at least until september.

Monday, March 28, 2011

the A to Z of the HFD

it's rainy and cold here today, and what's better on a monday morning than a little trip down hayley lane =)

A. Age: 27...and clearly i act every bit as mature as my age would suggest.
B. Bed size: full. yes, i'm 27, with a husband who's lived with me for like 4 years...and we sleep on a full size bed. one day we'll get a big one...but i'm not convinced it would fit in our bedroom right now. and we'll never get rid of the bed we have now, it's an antique cherry frame from my grandmother.
C. Chore you hate: um...all of them? seriously...i'm the worst housewife on earth. but i LOATHE laundry, cuz putting it away sucks...and dishes suck because food + hot water and soap = NASTY.
D. Dogs: 2. a pug and what we think is an australian cattle dog/corgi mix.
E. Essential start to your day: waking up? used to be coffee in a major way when i had to function in a work capacity in the a.m.
F. Favorite color: let the shoes talk. they say i live and die for hot pink.

G. Gold or silver: both actually. my everyday jewelry is white gold...but i LOVE gold too. especially big fat gaudy stuff lately =) and i dig mixing them too.
H. Height: 5'10" if i'm flat on my feet. it sucks buying pants, and dresses from the junior's department are out of the question...but for the most part i love it.
I. Instruments you play: a little piano, and there was a yearlong foray into clarinet in 6th grade...i still refer to it as a devil stick. damn thing.
J. Job Title: i prefer the term "trophy wife"...perhaps the more PC term is "stay at home wife". or "husband mooch". "unemployed american"? yeah....trophy wife sounds best =)
K. Kids: the aforementioned dogs. Keno and Bojangles are the only babies this girl needs at the moment...
eventually we want to have human babies. are you allowed to laugh when your kids play tug of war? cuz i do...all the time.
L. Live: in the dirrrty south.'s really just southwest georgia.
M. Mom’s name: Debra. and no...we don't look alike AT. ALL.

N. Nicknames: i get hales a lot. that's really about it.
O. Overnight hospital stays: not yet, ::knock on wood:: i figure those human babies might mean an overnight stay...but that's a ways away.
P. Pet peeve: i have to name 1? people who drive with their blinkers on. people who don't know the difference between your and you're. or there and their and they're. people who use big words incorrectly to try and sound smart. things that are spelled with Ks that should be spelled with Cs.
Q. Quote from a movie:"For the record, i do think there's such a thing as fate. It just works in really fucked up ways sometimes." - Can't Hardly Wait. this is the greatest movie EVER. just so you all know.
R. Right or left handed: i'm a lefty! i was ambidextrous as a kid, and my mom thinks i picked being left-handed to be difficult.
S. Siblings: one little sister, who's name is actually Robin...but she'll always be Squirt to me. and i am a WONDERFUL influence on her.

T. Time you wake up: i'm prepared for the hate with this one....usually between 10 and 10:30 am. go ahead, just curse under your breath at me. i can take it =)
U. Underwear: always! i don't get these trampy celebs rolling out to dinner and dancing with no panties. that's weird.
V. Vegetables you dislike: squash is nasty. i don't really like celery. but nothing, and i mean NOTHING compares to my hatred for bell peppers. GAGGGGG. they smell gross raw, they smell gross cooked, they make anything they touch taste like peppers....ick. hate.
W. What makes you run late: other people!! i am notoriously early all the time...i always have been. i hate being late...even knowing ALL my friends are perpetually running behind.
X. X-Rays you’ve had: none...BUT i did get an MRI of my head when i was in high school. i got a wicked sinus infection and ended up having to have surgery, and get a hole drilled in my head.
Y. Yummy food you make: psh, ALL my food is yummy. 85% is yummy! but i think the hubs would pitch a fit if i stopped making meatloaf and mashed potatoes.
Z. Zoo animal: peacocks. and tigers. and elephants. and monkeys. more importantly than my favorite zoo's about my husband has never even BEEN to the zoo?? i intend to remedy this soon =)

happy monday y'all!

Thursday, March 24, 2011

thought i was gonna have to give google...


first off, i have been slightly annoyed since 2009 that i had no way to link my blogger log-in/old email address to my new email address.

then i go last night to check in with what all of you are doing...and it tells me I CANNOT ACCESS MY OWN ACCOUNT.

had to wait for some BS text message number code, and then change my password.


but anyhoo, clearly i am back...and now, i am annoyed. which's time for a list of things annoying me.

1. the new old navy commercials. an obnoxious song about your ankles, or spelling cute, or being a layer player does NOT make me want to shop at your store.

2. the fact that my shoes i ordered SATURDAY are supposed to be here MONDAY. umm, should not take a week to get from indiana to georgia. it wouldn't take that long to drive myself to your indiana target and get them myself!!

3. the orkin man is coming today. he's a nice enough little dude i guess..but HE. IS. WEIRD. last time, he made up a baby that we apparently had without our knowledge. and asked about it. and kept insisting he thought we had NO dude.

4. the red cross keeps calling me about donating blood. I GET IT, THERE'S A SHORTAGE. but there's always a shortage. and you know what? having bumbling call center people call me and clearly read from a script at 7:30 at night? NOT the way to get me to offer up a vein yo.

my current bright spot is that there is a new angry birds game to play, and it was free for my droid...angry birds rio is the bomb =)

Wednesday, March 23, 2011

i need some major arm candy

i'm not talking arm candy of the handsome gentleman variety...cuz i kinda have that with my handsome husband.

(although, let's be real...if one joshua jackson was throwin' his game at me...i wouldn't say no. AT ALL)

i'm talking about the kind that makes you feel girly or tough or brings your whole outfit together.

i'm talking bracelets.

like these gorgeos gems i saw in the latest issue of people stylewatch. and $24 each isn't too bad....unless you want like ALL of them like i do. definitely hoping the hubs too my not so subtle hint these would make a great "just because you're my awesome wife and i love you" present. you can get your own here.

and for a little cheaper option, this whole set from forever 21 is less than $10. and once again, my lack of a F21 near me makes me sad...BUT a cousin says she'll pick them up for me if i want, and bring them to our family reunion next month.

oh, and will most DEFINITELY be hitting up the hobby lobby for the supplies for this beauty. this tutorial from studs and pearls seems pretty easy to follow...but i can't decide if i want black, or white...or some fun color!

cuz i've already made this one with nuts and twine...and i want more of these too!!

Tuesday, March 22, 2011

the best yes in the world

3 years ago today, i woke up for the first time engaged to the man of my dreams.

on march 21, 2008, this man got down on one knee, gave me the blingiest bling a girl could ask for, and asked me to be his wife.

then, we had cake.

19 months later,
we cried exchanging our vows (and if we're being honest....i basically cried the whole day),

and then we sealed the deal,

and then we had more cake!

saying yes to being this goofy, crazy, warm-hearted, amazingly smart and talented and driven and sexy man of mine is to this day one of the best decisions i've ever made =)

Monday, March 21, 2011

how does a person get bored with their own head?!

i hope all of you had a glorious that's finally spring, everything around my casa has a hazy yellow dust to it. it's pollen time around these parts...for me, that means nothing cuz i kinda won the genetic lottery on that front and it doesn't bother me at all.

hubs? spent friday at urgent care, found out he has a big-time sinus infection and it was close to getting in his ears. so he's on like...47 pills now. or something.

alright, on to the story at hand.

this is me, about a week ago at a friend's going away party. my hair is a little past my shoulders...and apparently i have the biggest face on the planet.

i don't hate my hair this length....but this is the first time in several YEARS i haven't been growing my locks out for someone's wedding...first one friend in '07, then another in '08, then mine in '09, and then last fall's one wrapped them all up!

so i've always either had long (for me) hair...or just chopped it off, to grow it back.

here's me on my honeymoon, for long hair reference. i did not really like it. also, ouzo SUCKS.

so, do i chop it back to just above my shoulders, another bob like i've been doing? i go big?

cuz i'm more than a little obsessed with ginnifer goodwin's hair here. i dig the swoop. plus...she has a roung-ish face like me.

also, LOVE the messiness of jessica stroup's 'do. i probably wouldn't get pieces in the front so short...but i might.

the only thing i worry about is the ends flipping out, i had my hair short when i was in college, and i always wore it sort of flipped because it would do that naturally. but i think it makes me look super young. not in a "ooh, she looks like she's a lovely 23, not almost-28", but like "i think she might be skipping sophomore social studies!".

also...i'm kind of hairstyling challenged. so i'd have to learn to actually do something to it.

so...what do you think? bob it again? chop it off? find a hobby to keep my hands off my hair?

Wednesday, March 16, 2011

are you cool enough to be a loser?

"Just go ahead and hate on me and run your mouth
So everyone can hear
Hit me with the words you got and knock me down
Baby, I don’t care
Keep it up, I’m tunin’ up to fade you out
You wanna be
A loser like me"

ahhh...have truer words ever been sung to this barely reformed drama geek? i think NOT. cuz even though i definitely do not have the best voice, and i was only in chorus in 8th grade because it meant only having to take PE for half the year....i feel like deep down, GLEE is a show about my life.

about being an outcast. about not feeling like you measure up...even if you were head cheerleader before you got knocked up.

and i can guarantee, any of you who don't watch this show...have probably felt that way before. maybe in high school. maybe in college. maybe last week at some work meeting. maybe with your sibling who always seems to outshine you just a little.

but that's the thing....we're ALL losers. everyone. we've all got different things that make us losers.

and you know what??


see that girl? she's all of 16 i think. and trust me when i say...she was definitely a loser. lucky for her...she went to a liberal arts magnet high school. so even the popular kids were smart kids too...and the jocks were in AP classes. and we didn't have a whole heck of a lot of bullying and such. or i just wasn't a big enough loser to know it.

and now? now that girl is a few months shy of 28...and she's been thinking of all the reasons she's a loser...and all the reasons why she loves it.

*i'm a complete and total klutz. i usually manage in public...but i've almost killed myself going up and down the stairs in my house more times than i can count.

*i'm a fountain of useless knowledge...which usually gets weird looks, NOT admiring stares.

*two words....drama. geek. i lived it...i loved it. i STILL have the t-shirts from thespian conference.

*i cry. a lot. when i'm happy. when i'm sad. when i see someone else crying. when i get really mad and frustrated. waterworks city.

*i didn't get kissed until i was 19. NINETEEN.

*deep down, i still desperately want to be one of the "cool girls".

*i get more than a little freaked out going places far away on my own. what if i do something wrong? what if i say something wrong?

*i've been unemployed for 9 months. and don't really have any job prospects lined up. (also haven't really been looking...which might be another reason i'm sort of a loser).

*i get REALLY excited when i get emails saying i have blog excited.

so....the real question is...have YOU embraced your inner loser? or have you always been a cool kid?

if so....can we be friends?

Friday, March 11, 2011

i hate doing dishes, BUT

i hate NOT being able to do them more.

i'll be the first to admit...i'm not the best dishwasher. cooking and dirtying up dishes? absofreakinglutely.

but then getting my hands dirty to wash those dishes?? no thanks.

i'm a strictly dish brush kind of girl...don't dig the whole sponge thing, and the hubs has known for the entire 3 and a half years we've live together that i will NOT touch the sink drain strainer thing full of food bits. WILL NOT.

so...when you add all those things together, do you know what you get?

someone who might have a meltdown if her kitchen sink doesn't freaking get its act together and start draining right!!!

i's a sink. its whole LIFE PURPOSE is to drain away water from my feeble washing attempts, right??


ugh...right now, literally both sides have water in them, and the hubs dumped a whole thing of draino max gel in the 2 sides (AFTER telling me when had to go to the store to get more...and explaining we had to get the same kind, cuz apparently unlike sweaters and CANNOT mix and match drain cleaners. can. but you'll explode your house. and i don't do blowing up, in the literal sense at least).

oh yeah, and they've also got dishes and weird stuff floating on the surface...cuz we intended to do dishes tonight. except the sink robbed us of that.

AND we can't run the dishwasher, because apparently it drains into the sink or something...and again with the explosions.

so, come might find me doing dishes in my backyard with the hose, or in the tub or something.


also...might have gotten myself a little treat for all my stress at the store when we bought draino.
also, might have given my husband the i-don't-even-know-who-you-are-and-how-we've-loved-each-other-so-long look when he said to me "what's a cream horn?"

nothing you're getting NOW buddy, since you don't know their won't miss me hoarding them all for myself.

Wednesday, March 9, 2011

when trying to be good goes awry

when i looked in my closet and realized there are several shirts and tops and cardis that STILL have the tags on them....i thought MAYYYYBBBEEEE it's time to look for outfit inspiration inside my closet, instead of out.

and then i went to the mall because i got bored.

while i didn't drop any cash yesterday....i will be soon. because i have found the PERFECT accessories for my wardrobe.

seriously...i came home and figured out THREE ensemble options for a party this weekend. on a tuesday!! that's basically unheard of around these parts.

please tell me you don't DIE for this ring. cuz i totally do. it looks like space or something...and the facets make it amazing. and it looks soooo good on my pointer ringer...or my middle one. not that i'd EVER show it to anyone there ;)

and this looks similar to the second...except it's not turquoise, but a similar blue to the first ring. but it's silver and a long oval. and i love it on my ring finger, or the middle one again.

cuz flipping someone off with accessories makes it less offensive, right?

anyhoo...i intend to rock these both on my right hand, with skinnies and boots and a coral top and oatmeal 3/4 sleeve cotton cardigan.

i'm already nerdily excited.

i hope i don't change my mind between now and saturday.

Friday, March 4, 2011

how i ended up NOT getting murdered

i'll be the first to admit...i have a TINGE of paranoia.

perhaps it's the 5 year tour in the news business i did...or the fact that our house got burgled in broad daylight in 2009. but either way....when i'm home alone, i tend to....dramaticize things.

so wednesday i was in the shower, minding my own business and shampooing my hair...when our doorbell rang.

and my heart started hammering.

but i figure, no bigs, they'll go away when no one comes to the door.

THEN whoever it is pounds on the door several times.

and i start freaking out even more.

THEN they ring the doorbell AGAIN, and i am officially freaking out. 2 dogs, who hate the doorbell and always always ALWAYS flip out when anyone rings it...yeah, they're silent. thanks dudes, mom can handle herself...or NOT.

so i peak out the bathroom window, and see a red truck parked in the yard. i put my robe on, grab my cell phone, go to the door to look through the peephole, and spy on the ground any blunt objects i could use to bludgeon an intruder.

THERE'S NO ONE AT THE DOOR. but the truck is still there.

cue my brain going around and around and around, figuring there's someone crouching down, waiting for me to open to the door, so they cam bum rush me and kill me in my own house. this is also the point i'm thinking i should have put on undies and pants, so my would-be murderer would have to at least work at little when he attacks me...cuz i watch A LOT of law & order SVU.

then the truck drives off...i calm down, and go about my merry way.

cue last night, while i'm getting our ravioli dinner plated...the doorbell rings again.

and it's this nice old man who's apparently in a wood turning club (wtf is that? no clue...are they high-class whittlers??), and he wants to know if he can have pieces of this little president's day endeavor

see...the whole top of this tree was basically gone...and rotted. so we chopped it down. APPARENTLY, sweet gum trees are good for more than just annoying the every-loving hell out of me with their infernal balls over my yard.

APPARENTLY, sweet gum wood makes super awesome fare for whatever the heck the wood turning club does.

oh yeah, and that nice old man?


apparently he wanted my wood...not to give me his.

Wednesday, March 2, 2011

there are several reasons i should not be left alone

thank goodness the husband comes home tonight! because...i really should not be left to my own devices.

1. i end up eating 2 mini grilled cheese sammies for dinner, since it's the only thing that sounds good. ALSO, dinner is at 9:30.

2. dinner is so late...because i may, or may not have spent about 6 hours watching season 1 of veronica mars on netflix instant streaming.

3. when i get bored watching tv...or really, when i get bored anytime...i tend to craft.

no, i will NOT be wearing these 2 items together.

the ring is the latest in several chunky stone endeavors...the others are dark blue, and kelly green, and a HUMONGOUS yellow one...but none of them have wire wrapping. cuz...a girl's gotta branch out sometimes.

and really...i just randomly think of things sometimes, AFTER i've done a run or 2 another way =)

i wish i could say i wasn't totally and freakishly obsessed with my new gold glittered bangle...BUT I SO AM!!! and it was maybe the easiest thing in the entire world.

AND i might have plans in the world for a skinnier one in black/dark grey....and probably more big chunky ones in different colors.

the best part? together....they cost about $4.

Tuesday, March 1, 2011

i wanna be her BFF

in our world of constant access to television and internet, and the juggernaut that is reality's easy to pick and choose heroes and villians, without ever knowing any of these "celebrities" at all.

but sometimes...i see people on tv, and i think to myself...we'd be friends. i do the same with all of you...even if you're just words on my computer screen, i feel like i "know" you, and consider a lot of you my friends.

so, i've been anxiously awaiting the return of one of my television besties.

it's true...i am OBSESSED with bethenny frankel.

i never really watched her season of real housewives, being a die hard atlanta fan and all...but bravo being bravo, i did catch a marathon of "bethenny getting married" one day.

and i have loved her potty-mouthed dramatic self since then. i LOVE her. i think everyone should use the phrase "_____ until your penis falls off" all. the. time.

and during last night's premiere, in between the hilarity of finding poo in the car, and getting her boobs measured...she also visited her husband's hometown.

and got really emotional when his hometown friends mentioned that being with them is about jason staying with his roots. and he said he loved her more in that dive bar than he ever had before.

because she was trying to understand where he came from. even though it's drastically different than her upbringing.

and i had this feeling wash over me, of KNOWING that feeling. of wanting the person you love to understand your life before them, to really get who you were before they came into your life...and why your life is so much better now.

because no matter how good i had it when i was a kid, and how awesome my family's even better getting to share all that awesomeness with someone else.

maybe it's because nate is out of town for a few days, and i feel so...LOST. it sounds dumb, but we literally are together all the time, and have been since we started dating. he's my other half, and he's the person who gets me the most...and without him here, i feel so off.

plus, our house is old, and it totally freaks me out and convinces me there's a killer waiting for me.

luckily...i've my swedish fish stash, and my dogs, and episodes of grey's and one tree hill to tide me over until i pick him up from the airport =)