seriously...i might actually burn out my own retinas.

remember 12 days ago, when i expressed my deep and abiding love for all things neon yellow?

yep, i'm still not over it.

because i clearly need this obnoxious bag in my life as soon as possible. and yes, i have totally contemplated the pink too...but the yellow? she calls to me with her bright-ass siren song.

oh you thought that was it? that i simply HAD to share my newfound love for a $35 clutch? yeahhhh....you ought to know me better by now.

because OF COURSE i also want to get my DIY on. because this neon studded clutch? TO FREAKING DIE FOR.

plus...it gives me a reason to finally buy that fluorescent pink spray paint i've been threatening the hubs with for YEARS. ::cue maniacal laugh::

so...who's gonna help me find some super sweet granny sunglasses when i blind myself with my own wardrobe?

did i mention i bought hot orange pants on monday? no? okay good...maybe you won't think i'm TOTALLY insane yet....maybe.

do dogs really care if you're pretty?

you know how some moms get those necklaces with their kids' names or initials on them? i sort of want to do that....only differently.

cuz these 2 handsome dudes are my babies. my snuggly, evil, plotting-world-domination-while-shamelessly-begging-for-belly-rubs babies.

and what better way to show my love for them...than with eyeshadow.

cuz sephora is making it possible. 

apparently the new line of buxom cream eyeshadows are all named after dogs, and they donate some money to animal charities or some such biznass when you buy them.

bronzed taupe? smokey pewter? YES FREAKING PLEASE.

cuz this pug and mutt mama needs to look pretty for her boys!

apparently i want to be a human highlighter.

you'd think if i could pick any marker in the spectrum, i'd totally want to be the bright pink one, right? yeah....i'd have figured so too. but apparently, pink is so 2009 hayley.


because apparently 2012 hayley wants to burn out your retinas with a searing yellow shade. ALL OVER MYSELF. (but not in a creepy weirdo fetish way. in a fashion way. muuuuuuuch different.)

oh how i wish i could make this beauty mine. cuz my boy marc jacobs does SO many things right. and this neon bag is one of them.  but for $500....i could do a LOT of damage at target for the price of this little pretty.

like this bad boy, for a whopping $25. from target. OF COURSE.

but is a neon yellow bag a little TOO impractical, even for this colored purse loving girl?? maybe....just maybe.

and my most favoritest of all

oh old navy...why do you do me SO right? cuz this dress....this dress is sick. it's also much more obnoxious in the best possible way in person. easily dressed down with boots or flat sandals. easily dressed up with some blinging jewelry and a fancy pair of heels.

and yes...OF COURSE i bought it on sale. and no, i do NOT intend to prance around my house in it because i currently love it more than all my other clothes.

probably not at least.

how do you say valentine in japanese?

we don't do major v-day things around these parts...but i figured i'd be an awesome wife and try out something fancy for my man.

i had EVERY intention of going all pioneer woman on nate, with this recipe for spicy stewed beef and grits.

until my cooking utensils turned on me.

see that black spot in the bottom of my dutch oven? no...not the slightly burnt residue...above that. that's a little thing i like to call THE ACTUAL CAST IRON OF THE POT.

cuz you know...apparently sometimes the enamel coating on your pan just flakes off while you're melting butter to brown beef before you simmer it for a few hours.

alas....my fancy pants dinner plans got scrapped with the quickness. and we got takeout hibachi instead. which is probably what should have been the plan to begin with.

at least i got delicious grocery store cupcakes out of the deal =)

now...to plot how much chocolate is too much chocolate to buy 50% off....

And then there's love

"And then there's love. I want you to love to the tips of your fingers, and when you find that love, wherever you find it, whoever you choose, don't run away from it. But you don't have to chase after it either. You just be patient, and it'll come to you, I promise, and when you least expect i...And remember, to love is to live" - Dawson's Creek

ahhhh, valentine's day. the day of hearts and cupids and candy treats...and lots of bitter singletons who love to rant about how dumb the holiday is. and lots of old married folk who love to rub it in people's faces that they don't NEED a holiday to show their love, they do it all the time.  i don't think either side is right at all.

but you know what both these factions have in common?

LOVE. 

and without love, life would be a lot more boring.

without love, these sweet dance moves wouldn't mean just as much as the mushy, teary-eyed ones from our wedding.

without love, this would just be a weird picture of hands and slushies...instead of a memento of a blissfully exhausted husband and wife stopping for a little sugary fuel after an epic journey home from the other side of the world.

without love, this is just 2 people in a picture with a hot dog car....instead of another item on a looooooong list of reasons why i adore that man.

without love, this is just a house..instead of a home.

without love...there is nothing.  and not just romantic love. without the love of my family and my friends, i'd never make it through the day.

so today...i'm saying "i love you" even more than usual.

HAPPY VALENTINE'S DAY!!

i'm trying to sell chicken...not plan my funeral

i pride myself on being a quasi-rational person. i try to keep my attitude in check, and not completely lose my shit.

most of the time.

but the past 2 days have apparently been a locally celebrated holiday known as "make hayley homicidal while she's driving to or from work" days. oh yes...it's a long festivity.

first...there was tuesday. you may remember...i had a wicked case of the sniffles. so i popped my 12 hour sudafed and headed to work....but first, i had to stop at the gas station. you know...so i didn't end up stranded.

so i do what any normal person would do, and pull up to the easiest pump to get to on my passenger side, and fill up.

but when i get back in my car, the car in front of me (which was facing me, front bumper to front bumper) is leaving.

and this 80 year old man rolling in his oldsmobile TOTALLY MEAN-MUGS ME FOR BEING THERE!!!

sorry gramps...but i'm not making 3 laps around the SIX pumps at the station so you don't have to be bothered with backing up THREE FREAKING FEET before going forward and leaving.

then yesterday, it's about 4:05, and i'm heading home after a few hours of slinging wings.  minding my own business, singing along to the radio...when i see a giant blue mass in my passenger-side rearview mirror.

oh no bigs...it's just a giant freaking tahoe about to sideswipe me.

oh yeah, and it was being driven BY PIMPLY-FACED TEEN WITH GREASY JUSTIN BIEBER HAIR.

so apparently my a 5 decade age different doesn't lessen the desire to kill me in my malibu.

oh yeah, and my dog is an asshole....

 because in 15 minutes unsupervised, he managed to drag all of these yarn balls out of their bag, NOT tip the bag over...and make giant knots that i got to unravel.

it's SO fun being me sometimes =)

sometimes, the universe just teaches you a lesson....with a big stick

sometimes, everything starts all hunky-dory, and you have every intention of playing a little photo-a-day game with your phone and your blog.

and then a few days go by and you realize the universe has several lessons for you like:

1. staying up drinking until 4am on a friday means you will spend ALL day saturday napping on the couch.

2. i am NOT 22 anymore. 28 1/2 makes it a lot harder to recover.

3. appaently, crashing all day saturday, and then having to work 4 hours at a wing joint ON SUPER BOWL SUNDAY means your immune system is slightly compromised.

4. SNIFFLES. SUCK.

5. once you get a few days behind on a photo challenge....catching up is hard.

sooooo....it probably won't happen. whoops.

BUT i do have one photo to show you....cuz it's awesome.

 my nook is so happy in its new pretty little case! plus...IT HAS BUTTONS. which makes me love it even more. especially since i did it all myself =)

maybe i'll crochet myself a little sudafed holder if this sinus issue does not resolve itself asap.

it totally makes me want to fight to the death

sooooo....i had this whole post planned today about this sweet neon yellow dress i want. seriously...it was gonna be epic. or at least several sentences about how i love it and need it in my life yesterday.

but then this happened.




and i full-on nerded out, AND might have gotten chills.

49 days mofos.....49 days until i have to arm myself to see a movie in a theater, because so help me, if some teenybopper making out with her emo boyfriend ruins this movie-going experience, I WILL CUT A BITCH. even if she can't drive herself.

happy friday loves!!