i'm done mourning my boyfriends...

my olympic boyfriends that is. i basically spent 17 days mainlining international athletic events like a two dollar meth whore on intervention...BUT WAY MORE CLASSY Y'ALL.

i would still do terrible things to one ryan lochte though...he may be dumb as a box of rocks...but that is one sexy man.

and then i of course had to spend two days mourning the loss of my beloved olympics, while simultaneously singing "spice world" and the celine dion hit "power of the dream" circa 1996.

in short...it's been a weird two weeks.

but now...now i'm back! aaaand....i'm once again freaking out a little. cuz see....sometimes, i jump into things because i think they sound awesome. and they probably ARE awesome...but i get so freaked out by the unknown that i convince myself that they AREN'T awesome, and oh yeah, that i totally suck at them.

in short...i got a job.

i'm now a regional account executive for a company that's putting on a home & garden show where i live. EXCEPT I'VE NEVER SOLD ANYTHING BUT BARBECUE AND CHICKEN WINGS. so...i'm feeling more than a lot in over my head at the moment.

because when i've never done something...i sort of paralyze myself. because i am insane, and would rather NOT do something, than be terrible at something. clearly...my childhood overachieving has made me a psychotic person.

it's basically like being a possum...when they get scared, they freeze up. sometimes, it means the predators go away. but sometimes...it means getting flattened by a soccer mom's minivan on a back road in rural georgia. (sheesh, that's a southern-fried anaology if ever i've written one).

basically i'm the possum. except instead of beady eyes and a weird rat tail, i've got a closet full of cardigans and a whole lot of internal anxiety. on the bright side... i've pretty much convinced myself that when one is working from home, and selling booth space to people who make windows and doors and pools and such...then colored jeans are totally acceptable "business" attire. cuz...they're fancier than real jeans. OBVIOUSLY.

i did manage to get some sweet business cards...so at least i've got that going for me.

basically...this is an internet cry for help. because if you have ANY tips on this kind of sales (aka getting people to buy space/advertising/etc), i'd love to hear it. before i drive my husband to an early grave from reassuring me that i do not in fact suck at life.

but at least i can take life advice from a pillow at kohls. so there's that.